Fremont CLJV Mtg

Ups and downs. It is seemingly difficult to explain and describe the being and person of Jesus to a group of teens whom you would think would care a little bit. Some did, many did not. We discussed who they thought God was, things he had done and not done, and read from Deut. and the book of Psalms which both expressed who God is, was, and how many long to be with HIM.

There was somewhat of an apple sauce surprise in a small cup including ingredients like parsley, italian seasonings, celery salt, and rosemary. It goes down smooth with ketchup.

4 Months in Adavnce

This is my eldest son, in whom I am well pleased and very proud.

He is just like me in many ways…for example. This 10 year old pictured at left called his grandmother and scheduled a week to spend with his grandparents 4 months in advance to be certain to get in in their calendar as well as our own.

Aahh…10 years old and is already picking up the fact that with my mother…you have to plan things in advance, otherwise, chaos erupts and guess who’s to be blamed.

Who Created the Cadbury Creme Egg

One of the best side marketing schemes of the candy industry is the Cadbury Creme Egg. Although, now that I think about it, and perhaps you would agree with me, I believe that the creme egg was inspired by a higher power, however I have sever difficulty deciphering which power that would actually be…from above or down below? The creamy goodness surounded by a thin Milk chocolate shell just itching to be slowly devoured with a glass of ice cold milk standing by just in case you need a smooth chaser…it’s just what the doctor ordered, but I don’t think that he could even prescrive such a medicine if it were not for the Good Lord above. It is carefully wrapped in an inviting foil which is of an easy access in a discrete manner so as not to disturb the wife whom told you and the boys to abstain from such heavenly dessert until after dinner…and that is where Satan enters. He sits there…tempting you with every trick in the book. “No one will ever know…the wife will never find out….the kids are in the other room…the egg could be eaten with ease, savored for its gooey goodness and gone before none are the wiser. You take the egg from its foil of captivity if only to set it free for a moment. You only need a smell to tame the temptation of the Prince of Dark Chocolate…excuse me…Darkness..but then…trouble hits. Your nostrils flare and you accidentally plunge into the shell like a binge drinker on a bender, unable to stop. The dog in the other room with its uncanny superhearing comes running in with tail wagging and ear half cocked to the side. He sits at you side, pawing at the fabric on your pants for attention because he now knows your little secret and is threatening to bark for a bite if not given in the next few seconds.
You try to shew him away, but the chocolate dripping from the curves of your mouth is spattered unto your dressy white oxford button down and pierre Cardin tie bought for you buy the kids you have forsaken with your dishonesty to them by hiding in your office to secretly consume one fo the last few eggs in the neighborhood. The dog barks, the wife yells at you for the dog thinking she has to go outside, the kids come running as you had so stearnly told them to do before today….to take care fo the dog as part of their responsibility…it has backfired on you drastically as they near the office door…twist the knob…and…

Doggie Diapers

We have a dog that needs diapers! Is that not the strangest thing that you have ever heard. Talk about the effects of getting older. What in the world is happening? You wear diapers when you are young, you grow into big boy underoos, then underwear, and when you become to cool for that word, its…draws, then you get older, hair falls out and your wearing diapers again???

We haven’t had the best of luck with dogs. You see, when we first moved into our new house I thought that we just had to have a dog. I mean, that’s just how it is. The man gets his castle, and must have his faithful companion. Unfortunately, along with that, if you are to please the little woman, Manmust accept his fate and be willing to allow his arch enemy and worst headache that simply won’t go away after two asprine, the feline. They make great target practice, and with a little Tony Chacherie’s and some garlic, grilled over charcoal and an open flame…taste almost like chicken, but that is where I personally feel that their purpose ceases to exist. My wife had two headaches that had to enter our new castle. Soon afterward, they developed an infection and were confined to the bathroom so as not to bleed on the new carpeting that cpst more than their brother and sister cats across the US put together. They were to remain in the bathroom until she was able to secure a nice home for them to survive…or until I oculd get her to leave the house for a few hours while I prepared, “Dinner”…whichever would come first. Fortunatley for the pointless animals she was able to pawn them off on the folks…while I secretly worked my magic to secure a real pet. That is when we adopted Uncle Vinny…which turned out to be a she, and then we later found out that somehow we had been given the world’s dumbest animal…I thought to myself…where are those cats. Let’s get them back here. Uncle Vinny, like his friends in the mob who eventually turned “States Evidence” and forked over info to the feds, entered into the Federal Witness Protection Program…never to be heard from again. I am unsure to this day if he actually made it to the program, or if one of my associates, uhh…gave him a neck tie party and a pair of cement shoes to match.
Now, the dog we own is one of the friendliest dogs I have ever met, “Carmella” after a one, Tony Soprano’s wife, and simply enjoys the company and attention of anyone willing to bestow it upon her. Two weeks ago we discovered that she was slowly bleeding from the rear. What the…??? After a few phone calls and talks, as it turns out, that is what happens to the females who are not fixed. This dog is nearly 100 years old in dog years (might as well be the same for human years, the way she moves a doggy wheel chair might be in order) and is still menstrating! What the dileo?
We bring them water, we bring them food. We give them baths. We take them for walks, pick up their crap, brush their hair, and take them for rides while talking to them as if they were babies believing deep in the heart of our sould that they understand every word muttered in some foreign baby language that could only be explained by John Travolta staring in a badly made 80’s movie…entitled…”Look Who’s Talking”. If I were an alien, and I asked the first human I saw shortly after invading the Earth, to take me to their leader…I would expect them to take me to their pet dog. After all, the animal merely sputters a bark here and there and we step in line…while the kids sorely ask for our help in a math problem and we swiftly tell them to wait until a commercial.
This has been another total waste of time in a World Gone Mad by none other than the Bakerboy Himself.

Who would have thought that we could find so many wasteful things to do with our time. I couldn’t possibly teel you haw many people I have heard talk about the fact that TIME is our most important commodity…not money…oil…or carabu in Alaska which we absolutely should not kill…so that we may spend more money on foreign oil for the fat cats that already control most of the world’s wealth…and with things going so well, why change it, right? Besides, the carabu are such cute adorable mamals that offer so much to the earth, how could we even possibly consider screwing them and drilling Alaska so that we could actually afford to drive the suv’s we all know and love sometime’s more dearly than food itself. That’s right, folks. I have actually heard some one say, “Sorry honey, we can’t afford those apples, Mommy meeds to put gas in the explorer.” I though to myself, “What?”

Ahh, yes. We can watch tv, listen to music, watch tv and listen to music, surf the internet, surf the internet while listening to music, listen to music while surfing the internet and watching the latest episode of the Sopranos, read…wait…scratch the last one…no one knows waht that means. We could surf with the blackberry, clean, organize, decorate, write a book, and blog. However, I must admit, I do enjoy an occasional medieval style lashing of our cat while sipping IBC root beer every now and again. It relaxes me after a long day. The root beer is good too.

This has been another total waste of time in a world gone mad by none other than the Bakerboy himself.

We decided to take a short break from a world gone mad and neglect to turn on the tv. This of course meant no tv, no movies, no tivo, no Oscars, and alas…no GodFather. Our feble attempt soon became a sour reality of, “Whatdo you do when you don’t flip on the boob tube?” We cleaned, organized, swept, talked, played games, slept, and that took care of Wednesday. Now what?

By Friday my fam had eluded me and slipt into a tv coma for an hour while I was away on business. No, my business did not include catching up on the TGIF programming that unfortunately has numbed our minds to what productive things we could acutally be doing with our time.

We watched one movie on Saturday, “The Sword in the Stone” a disney classic back when they still used a pencil and paper to create the cartoon instead of the fancy smancy puters. (On a side note, it is great to see that the movies and cartoons that I enjoyed as a kid, my kids still get a kick out of watching today!)

Although I would rather not admit it, I do feel that the tv, though mezmorizing, is still a valuable item in the household today. Allow me to explain before the self righteous, never owned a television, it rots your brain, me haters pipe in and tear my house down. How many of us have had a hard day at work, school, etc? We come home and need a wee bit of mindless consumption before we hit the hay, otherwise I find it rather difficult to escape the day’s trade and catch a good night’s rest. With it’s powers of hypnotism, it can engulf you if you let it. You have to show it “Who’s the Boss” (Tony Danza) Learn to turn it off every once and a while. Before you know it, it could be training you to turn it on every chance you get, rather than you being the master and commander of your own destiny.

Are you addicted to tv? Movies? Sound? How uncomfortable is it for you to have no music or tv in the background as you work, clean, read, etc?

I was chatting with a good friend of mine who told me that it is impossible for her to work without some sound. She’s got the trusty Bose Wave Radio at her side and is often repremanded by her husband for playing it too loud for too long as she works into the wee hours of the morning. I can relate, and I don’t think I would be stretching it if I spoke for many people in this country who has the tv on, radio on, mp3 on, Ipod on as they work into the early morning hours burning all three ends of the candle.(It’s the millineum, we have to be thinking 3-dimensional. There’s no time for the 2 ended candle thing anymore)

Who know? Maybe if we worked as hard to keep the tv off as we do on, we might be able to find something else to complain about aside from all the famous actors getting rich off of our ratings…which we so gladly hand them, because we are in constant need of mindless consumption.

This has been another total waste of time in a World Gone Mad from the Bakerboy himself. You can download the podcast from Itunes.